Saturday, December 31, 2016

Just When You Thought You Heard It All News (12-31-2016)

“I ain’t a killer, but don’t push me.”

Let’s pray this doesn’t happen again.

There was mass confusion at a Christmas service in Sri Lanka when the program featured the words to Tupac Shakur’s 1997 song, “Hail Mary,” instead of the traditional Catholic prayer, according to multiple reports.

The service took place on December 11 in Colombo, but pictures of the program went viral during the Christmas holiday. 

As the Guardian notes, both the “Hail Mary” prayer and Tupac Shakur’s rap song ask Mother Mary to intercede on behalf of sinners, but their is a huge difference on the specifics.

The prayer, which is based on two passages from St. Luke’s Gospel, goes like this:

Hail Mary full of Grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed are thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen. 

Shakur’s version is more explicit, with lines like, 

I ain’t a killer, but don’t push me

Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to getting @&%#%..

Picture paragraphs unloaded, wise words being quoted

Peeped the weakness in the rap game and sewed it.

Andrew Choksy attended the service and recognized the Shakur song immediately.

“A lot of people were in shock as whether it was a joke or someone would actually rap the song,” he told Mashable. “A few of the older ladies in front of us could not stop looking at the printed booklet.”

Organizers discovered the mistake before the service began and asked for the books back, according to Father Da Silva of the Archdiocese of Colombo, which put on the event.

“The page was in the middle of the booklet,” Da Silva told CNN. “When people looked at this page, they saw it before the start of the show. Two people saw it and alerted us to it.”

Da Silva said the printer was a young boy who downloaded the wrong version.

“We are very sorry to say that this happened,” he said.

There are child prodigies and then there’s Ashlynd Howell, a child prodigy who needs her behind beat!

 Ashlynd used her unsuspecting napping mother’s thumb to unlock her phone and purchase toys. The story goes as follows:

While Bethany Howell napped on the couch last week, her daughter Ashlynd, 6 years old, used her mother’s thumb to unlock her phone and open the Amazon app. “$250 later, she has shopped for all her Christmas presents on Amazon,” said Ms. Howell, of Little Rock, Ark.

The purchases left the girl’s parents with “13 order confirmations for Pokémon items” and the feeling that they’d been hacked. The 6-year-old later assured mom and dad that she’d been shopping. 

Ashlynd’s mother indicated that the child was “really proud of herself.” 


The popular Christmas song “Santa Claus Is Coming to Town” warns kids not to cry or pout, but it doesn’t say anything about not robbing banks.

Now police in Memphis, Tennessee, are trying to find a man who robbed a bank on Wednesday while wearing a Santa mask.

The criminal Kris Kringle walked into the Memphis City Employees Credit Union on Elvis Presley Boulevard around 10 a.m. sporting the trademark white beard, red coat and red hat with fluffy white trim, according to local media sources.

He handed out candy canes to people in the bank and even wished them a merry Christmas.

Then the thieving Santa handed the bank teller a note demanding cash, the Commercial Appeal newspaper reports. 

The teller gave Santa an undisclosed amount of money and he left the bank.

However, he didn’t leap into a sleigh or any kind of getaway car. Surveillance video shows him walking down Raines Road, according to the newspaper.

No one was hurt, except, of course, for the Christmas spirit.

“That’s kinda low. And then come and do something bad like this here? That reflects on the kids,” is how customer Angelo Becton reacted when he heard about the robbery, according to WREG TV.

No arrests have been made. Anyone with information is encouraged to call 901-528-CASH.

The real Santa Claus was unavailable to comment on the robber’s “Naughty List” status.


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