Just When You Thought You Heard It All News (12-20-14)

A Pennsylvania moron is in the joint for allegedly smoking one inside a police station.

Carlen Higgs, 33, was arrested on Sunday morning after he allegedly walked into the Upper Darby, Pennsylvania, police station, sat on a bench and started smoking a joint.

"He starts puffing away," Upper Darby Superintendent Michael Chitwood told Philly.com.

Higgs was put in a jail cell where he allegedly took off his pants, defecated on the floor and smeared the feces around the cell walls.............

 Higgs was taken to a mental health facility for an evaluation where it was determined he was high on unspecified drugs.

Higgs is charged with disorderly conduct, public drunkenness, marijuana possession and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Stop trying to teach your old dog new tricks,  fetching, and running over is a thing of the past. Now you have to teach them how to keep the safety on!

A Wyoming man is recovering in the hospital after his dog accidentally shot him. In a phone interview on Thursday, Johnson County Sheriff Steve Kozisek confirmed that Richard L. Fipps, 46, was hospitalized Monday after his dog stepped on a loaded rifle in the bed of his pickup truck and accidentally fired it. The rifle's safety was off, Kozisek said. OR SO HE THINKS!! According to Big Horn Mountain Radio, Fipps was removing snow chains from his truck when he was shot in the left arm. I bet he won't forget the puppy chow next time!

"The rifle was loaded and in the bed of the truck [with some other gear], and the dog hopped up there and either stepped on it or caused something to move and set it off," Kozisek told the Huffington Post. Umm, hmm. Sure.

Fipps transported to Sheridan Memorial Hospital via ambulance. His condition was not released, but his injuries were not life threatening, according to Big Horn Mountain Radio.

Kozisek said that the accident could have easily been prevented, had the gun not been loaded.

"Carrying a loaded rifle in a truck is never a good idea, safety on or safety off," Kozisek said.

The sheriff, who has worked in law enforcement for 42 years, said he'd never seen a case where a dog shot a man. I guess he forgot about George "The New OJ" Zimmerman!

Quick! Somebody run out back and get me a switch!!!

An 11-year-old girl stole thousands of dollars from her grandma and then told a cab driver to take her halfway across the country so she could meet a 16-year-old boy she'd been chatting with online.

NEVER MIND! I'm about to take my belt off!!!!

Alexis Waller is safe and sound and will not face any charges after her pre-teen hijinks.

Authorities said Waller stole $10,000 from her grandmother's sock drawer in Bryant, Arkansas. Then she hitched a ride with a stranger to Little Rock where she called a cab.

Waller told the cab driver to take her to Jacksonville, Florida.

"I said I need to go to Jacksonville, Florida," Waller told KARK. "He's like, 'do you have money' and I'm like, 'yes.'"

The total cost of her trip would have been $1,300.

 Waller got about 500 miles toward her destination, until cops got in touch with the cabbie, who told them the pair were in the Atlanta suburbs.

Her parents said they are upset with their daughter, but also very glad to have her home.

Waller might be a troublemaker, but her parents could have it much worse.

Worse than an grown behind 11 year old who steals from Grand Ma and then goes on a 500 mile road trip?!?!

PR